Located within the Humboldt County Fairgrounds in the heart of Ferndale, a town that's somewhat famous for raising celebrity chef and overly enthusiastic BBQ fan, Guy Fieri—well, as famous as a town can get—lies an unexpected and utterly quirky landmark: the final resting place of three butterfat champion cows.
Affectionately known as the Champion Cow Graves, these three slightly morbid plaques pay homage to a trio of udderly famous bovines that brought glory to Ferndale during the 1950s to '70s. Now, some might find the concept of side-by-side tombstones for grass-chewing cows a tad peculiar, but these four-legged heroes truly earned their right to a regal burial, preserving Ferndale's status as the Cream City. While I never had the pleasure of meeting these dairy divas, let's indulge in some imaginative eulogies:
First in line is Silken Lady's Ruby of F., a true pioneer who boldly steered Ferndale into the 1950s. Much like the decade itself, I picture her as a bit bland but with a survivalist spirit stemming from the Great Depression. Her milk may have been on the sour side, but it didn't spoil quickly. As the OG cow of the posse, she rightfully claims Grave #1.
Next, we have Challengers Joyce VG., a name that sounds more like a spy for the FBI (Federal Bovine Investigator). I imagine her engaging in mysterious activities, with VG serving as a code word decipherable only within communist circles. Despite her shadowy and somewhat shady past, the silky smooth milk she produced earned her a spot in Grave #2.
Closing our bovine tribute is Sunny King Berna, the reigning world butterfat champion of 1977. Judging by her vibrant name, she likely radiated a calm demeanor and cheery attitude during the swinging disco and party era that birthed her. While surrounded by bell-bottom-wearing hippies and political turmoil, Sunny kept her head up and utter down, earning Grave #3. The milk probably tastes a little like cocaine.
Now, if you're still skeptical about mourning dead cows publicly, consider this: Ferndale's fame hinges on these bovine graves or the dude with flames on his shirt hosting "Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives." Pick your poison when passing through town.
DIRECTIONS: Upon reaching the Humboldt County Fairgrounds, take 5th St. to the main gate, drive to the back, and keep right. The graves will be on the left, and I assure you, they're the only cow graves for miles. You can't miss 'em.
